You know that feeling, that feeling of the first date jitters. You’re anxious for days leading up, maybe you’re excited or even thrilled. You worry about how you’re going to do your hair, what makeup look to do, and what clothes you’re going to wear. Where is this date to? Maybe this is a date to a fancy five-star restaurant, small coffee shop, walk around your local park, roller skating, kayaking or an amusement park. Is it with your lifelong best friend you just realized you had feelings for, someone you just met online, or the classmate you sit next to in biology? No matter who it is, there’s so much to think about. There are so many things that come to mind that have to get done leading up to that special day. But wait, have you wondered about what you’re going to talk about? Do you know what you want to talk about? Are you completely and utterly stumped? Is your mind blank? You don’t want to show up to the date unoriginal and break the ice with, “what do you think of this weather lately?” That’s so cliché. Try to think of things that will spark their interest. Try to get them to feel comfortable about opening up to you. Here are 5 things you can talk about on your first date to help them open up and that won’t bore them to sleep.
- Their favorite childhood memory.
Ahh childhood, what a simpler time. A time with less worries and less fears. What was their favorite memory? Was it watching Disney movies with their cousins after Thanksgiving, having playdates with kids from grade school while grandma was baking her famous donuts in the kitchen, picnics at the park with their mom after she took them to a dentist appointment, roller skating at summer camp, or maybe it was that family road trip they took to Maine every summer? You can tell a lot about a person from their past. What shaped them into the person they are today. How did they grow up? Although, they might not be open to talking about it or want to talk about it. It is a valid first date topic.
- Their favorite music genre, artist or photographer.
This can be an easier topic to talk about, it’s not so thought consuming. Usually, it is easy for people to talk about their favorite type of music or artist. What does your date like to listen to? Are they into rock? Pop? Hip-hop? Jazz? Country? Reggae? Can you guys vibe to the same music? Can you sing along to high school musical on long car rides together? Are they into head-banging loud music or calm soothing music? Do they have a favorite artist or are they just not that into art? If they’re not so into music or art maybe they prefer photography. Do they enjoy photography or are they just not aware of many photographers? Maybe they are just not into keeping up with artists of any kind? That’s completely okay.
- Their dream travel destination.
Would your date like to travel? If so, where would they go if given the chance to leave right now? Would they want to be floating on a gondola ride in Venice, or do they get seasick? Maybe it’s Hawaii because they’d like to scuba dive in Maui, or maybe they’ve always wanted to ski in the Swiss Alps. Does your date hate airplanes or would they love to spend 9 hours flying from Newark to Budapest? Do they yearn to travel or would they rather stay in the comfort of their home? Would they enjoy a cruise to the Caribbean island’s or would they rather take a hike on the Appalachian Trail? Do they see themselves traveling to a remote location like Easter Island or a busy city like Mumbai? Are they full of energy and willing to walk The Great Wall of China or are they more relaxed and would rather take a stroll down the streets of Bordeaux and stop for a cappuccino?
- What motivates them/ Who is their inspiration?
What motivates your date? Do they have a hard time getting out of bed in the morning, or do they have a heart full of passion and are ready to embrace the day ahead? Maybe it’s something simple that speaks to them like enjoying the sunrise. Would they rather wake up early, make a cup of coffee and have a strong grasp on the day to come, or do they have a deep hatred for waking up and leaving their warm comfy bed. Regardless, what is that one thing that makes them say, “okay it’s time.” Is there a little voice in their head screaming, “GO, GO, GO, it’s a new day get up!” Maybe it’s an internal battle for them to get up every morning. Maybe it’s not so much of what inspires them to get up, but more importantly, who inspires them? Who makes your date want to grow and better themselves? Maybe a certain individual has brought light to them on their darkest days. Do they even feel inspired by anyone? They might be their own inspiration. Who has helped them overcome their biggest battles and show them ambition, passion, and strength? Was it their mom, their dad, or maybe even their younger siblings? Who is the strongest person they know? In what ways does this person inspire them? What does your date have to say about the motto, “live every day as if it was your last?”
- What is their greatest fear?
This could be a tougher topic to talk about, it’s okay if they don’t want to discuss it. If they are open to talking about it, then great! Is there something that makes them scared to their core? It could be as simple as an irrational fear of spiders, being attacked by a shark, or maybe it’s the fear of heights and they’re terrified of flying. On the other hand, it could be something more personal, like the fear of losing someone close to them, failing to please the people around them or screwing up. Does your date feel anxious leaving the house because of the thought that they can get hurt on the way to work? Is there a gut-wrenching feeling they have about a certain place or thing? Although, maybe your date is one of those people who have no fears. Maybe they are an adrenaline junkie who lives off the speed of a fast car or just plain enjoys concurring their fears. Your date can surprise you, with the fact that they could live for the thrill of feeling invincible.
These are just a few of the endless ideas you and your date could talk about. Whatever you do, just go into the date with an open mind and heart. Good luck and just remember to be yourself and have fun!